Hey (to whoever is reading this),
Ok, I just finished watching the verdict of Lindsey Lohan (or however the devil to spell her name) and I laughed my ass off! I really have no sympathy for her anymore. At first it was a child star gone bad. You're thinking with all the support she got from her fans, family, and friends it was a one time thing. Nope! She had to go to classes, that she skipped, and gets a thing around her ankle to test her blood alcohol level, which she complains about cause it messes with her photo shoot and probably doesn't go with any of her outfits. But after awhile it was 'Lindsey Lohan is exhausted' Lindsey Lohan losing to much weight' 'Does LiLo have an alcohol problem?' Now tell me, what's the point of asking all these questions when we could all see, plain as day, that she was turning from the beautiful freckled kid to a crack whore?! I swear, Hollywood is the only place in the world that raises up anorexic, alcoholic crack whores and tells little girls that that's what they should aspire to be. She is acting like a typical celebrity by thinking all this stuff doesn't apply to her. And in a way, after her sentencing, she's right. I mean, think about it, first of all do you notice she's not going to prison like a regular person would if they were in her situation. She's just going to jail which will probably consist of her just her and the cell will probably be suite like with DVR!! I mean, in one sense she's getting what she deserves but in a sense it's showing favortisim which is just bull. She broke the law and has deffinately been given more chances than the rest of us would. Just because she has a lot of money and the judges kids probably loved her in 'Herbie' doesn't mean that any celebrity should get special treatment. Especially female celebrities because they get off on almost everything. I mean, take away their phone for a day and they think they're in jail. They should really know what jail is so they have more to say than, "Buy my merchandise and watch my movie." All they can really say is, "Having something like this on your record can almost ruin you." They don't really know what jail is which is just sad.
5/27/2010
What's been going on lately?
I was able to get a job at a really good Asian restaurant called Stir Crazy and orientation starts on Monday. I'll probably be a waitress. That's what I hope because I love human interaction...despite what my mom will tell you :P. Anyway, I've been wanting a job for, like, ever. It will give me something to do because I've just been hanging around the house and sleeping. I mean, when I have to much time on my hands I just go into hibernation. There have been summers where people just never saw me. They'd be putting stuff on my wall on Facebook asking why I was MIA. It was starting to happen again after I moved back in with my parents after my failed relationship/engagement with 'he who must not be named.' Half out of depression and half because there was nothing to do. Now, my parents would say, "There's lots to do. Housework is never done. You could do some laundry, stack the dishwasher, clean the living room, and your room!" But you know how that goes. There was nothing really to make me do it. I mean, one day I cleaned the entire place. Everywhere I tell you! For like 2 or 3 days they were at a loss to tell me what I should do. My brother started to suggest I get a hobby. Like reading or getting back to my guitar. I did that for a little while but there was nothing that made me want to. There was no drive. That's when I said I needed a job. Something to keep me busy and still entertain me for most of the day.
I'm very close to killing my brother's cat. You see, for a few days he's been crying cause he wants to go outside. So, my mom suggested I take him outside for a little while today. We were out there for a half hour. It would've been longer but it was hitting noon so the sun was getting real high, which made me hot, and it was heating up, which made me really hot. I tried picking the cat up and he hissed at me! That cat loves me and it hissed at me. I started yelling at the cat and conversing with the cat....yeah I know. I opened the door and told him to go. He meowed at me and I said, swear to God, "I don't care! Get in the house young man!" I finally tricked him back inside where he decided to cry and whine and run all over the house trying to find an opening to get out of. Speaking of which...I haven't heard a peep out of him. Hmmm, I guess I'll look around to make sure he hasn't found an opening.
Anyway, my parents got DVR while I was gone. So I've been recording the good shows on channel 105 and 106 that come on at night. I used to stay up and watch them but now that I have a job to worry about I'm trying to get back on my sleeping schedule which will be hard. The only time I've really had a sleeping schedule is when I was a kid. Now, even when I do go to sleep at a decent hour I wake right back up. When I lived with 'he who must not be named' I'd wake up and go on the computer for like an hour or two. I went back on my sleeping pills for awhile and it does keep me asleep. I just can't believe I need sleeping pills to keep me asleep. When I went back on them and I was sleeping all night I was up all day just bored out of my mind. But now I have to snap out of it cause I have a job (it feels so good to say that) to worry about. So I guess I'm gonna be going back on the sleeping pills.
I've also decided to get back to my reading. I'm re-reading 'Gone with the Wind.' Excellent movie and, from what I can remember, excellent book! I find that Scarlett and I are very similar except she's more to the extreme than I am. If you know me for real and you know something of Scarlett you'll be able to see the similarties.
Everything is going awesome with my new boyfriend. We text a lot (don't worry I'm keeping an eye on my texts) and are just random together. He's really supportive and really positive which has helped out a lot. You see, I'm a worrier. I worry about absolutely nothing or if there is something I worry even more. When I was worried about getting the job at Stir Crazy all I could think was, "They said they would call. But other places said that. But they said they really need people. But what if they were lying through their teeth and smiling and they don't want me!!" I was fretting like crazy. That's all I could talk and think about. But what did my boyfriend do? He told me to calm down, told me my personality was perfect for being a waitress, if they didn't take me then it's there loss, the worse they could say is no, which is just one word that is only powerful if I give it power, and that I need to believe I'll get the job. Cause, if I hope then that means there's room for denial. Can you say best advice in the world?! So yeah, he's awesome <3
I'm really worried about registering for classes. With all the drama that was going on in my life during my freshman year my grades suck something awful. They're dreadful. I'm not just saying that because I haven't seen my grades and I'm expecting the worse. I'm saying I didn't turn in assignments, didn't study. The one class I know I passed with at least a C is Japanese. I've also switched my major to nursing. But they might make me take certain classes again when my major was International Studies. I mean, my mom showed me her grades from when she was under stress and they were about as horrible as mine! For real! I mean, my mom is the smartest girl I know and there were her grades just as bad as mine! But then on the other side of the paper I saw her grades of when she got really serious and tried her hardest and they were the same grades I got when I started highschool and was very serious. So I know she won't be horribly disappointed in me. The point is I'm disappointed and ashamed in myself because I let such crap get in the way of my education which is really important to me. So, when I go to register for classes, I'm gonna see my grades, register for the classes I need and have to take, go home and eat like crazy for about 2 days, regain my composure, work all summer, then work really really hard to get my GPA back to where it belongs, around a 3.2 or 3.3 at least.
So, for those who read this, now you know what's been happening. Wish me luck with registering for classes cause I'm gonna need it big time.
I'm very close to killing my brother's cat. You see, for a few days he's been crying cause he wants to go outside. So, my mom suggested I take him outside for a little while today. We were out there for a half hour. It would've been longer but it was hitting noon so the sun was getting real high, which made me hot, and it was heating up, which made me really hot. I tried picking the cat up and he hissed at me! That cat loves me and it hissed at me. I started yelling at the cat and conversing with the cat....yeah I know. I opened the door and told him to go. He meowed at me and I said, swear to God, "I don't care! Get in the house young man!" I finally tricked him back inside where he decided to cry and whine and run all over the house trying to find an opening to get out of. Speaking of which...I haven't heard a peep out of him. Hmmm, I guess I'll look around to make sure he hasn't found an opening.
Anyway, my parents got DVR while I was gone. So I've been recording the good shows on channel 105 and 106 that come on at night. I used to stay up and watch them but now that I have a job to worry about I'm trying to get back on my sleeping schedule which will be hard. The only time I've really had a sleeping schedule is when I was a kid. Now, even when I do go to sleep at a decent hour I wake right back up. When I lived with 'he who must not be named' I'd wake up and go on the computer for like an hour or two. I went back on my sleeping pills for awhile and it does keep me asleep. I just can't believe I need sleeping pills to keep me asleep. When I went back on them and I was sleeping all night I was up all day just bored out of my mind. But now I have to snap out of it cause I have a job (it feels so good to say that) to worry about. So I guess I'm gonna be going back on the sleeping pills.
I've also decided to get back to my reading. I'm re-reading 'Gone with the Wind.' Excellent movie and, from what I can remember, excellent book! I find that Scarlett and I are very similar except she's more to the extreme than I am. If you know me for real and you know something of Scarlett you'll be able to see the similarties.
Everything is going awesome with my new boyfriend. We text a lot (don't worry I'm keeping an eye on my texts) and are just random together. He's really supportive and really positive which has helped out a lot. You see, I'm a worrier. I worry about absolutely nothing or if there is something I worry even more. When I was worried about getting the job at Stir Crazy all I could think was, "They said they would call. But other places said that. But they said they really need people. But what if they were lying through their teeth and smiling and they don't want me!!" I was fretting like crazy. That's all I could talk and think about. But what did my boyfriend do? He told me to calm down, told me my personality was perfect for being a waitress, if they didn't take me then it's there loss, the worse they could say is no, which is just one word that is only powerful if I give it power, and that I need to believe I'll get the job. Cause, if I hope then that means there's room for denial. Can you say best advice in the world?! So yeah, he's awesome <3
I'm really worried about registering for classes. With all the drama that was going on in my life during my freshman year my grades suck something awful. They're dreadful. I'm not just saying that because I haven't seen my grades and I'm expecting the worse. I'm saying I didn't turn in assignments, didn't study. The one class I know I passed with at least a C is Japanese. I've also switched my major to nursing. But they might make me take certain classes again when my major was International Studies. I mean, my mom showed me her grades from when she was under stress and they were about as horrible as mine! For real! I mean, my mom is the smartest girl I know and there were her grades just as bad as mine! But then on the other side of the paper I saw her grades of when she got really serious and tried her hardest and they were the same grades I got when I started highschool and was very serious. So I know she won't be horribly disappointed in me. The point is I'm disappointed and ashamed in myself because I let such crap get in the way of my education which is really important to me. So, when I go to register for classes, I'm gonna see my grades, register for the classes I need and have to take, go home and eat like crazy for about 2 days, regain my composure, work all summer, then work really really hard to get my GPA back to where it belongs, around a 3.2 or 3.3 at least.
So, for those who read this, now you know what's been happening. Wish me luck with registering for classes cause I'm gonna need it big time.
5/16/2010
I don't know what to do!
I've been wondering what to do with my life for a quite a few weeks. I just don't know what to do. A really really big part of me wants to get a degree in nursing but while doing so try my hand at wrestling. Yes yes I know a bunch of you are saying, 'Not again! I thought you were past that.' But it's always been in the back of my mind.
It's not like I'm only in it for the fame and fortune but fighting professionaly really appeals to me and I don't know why. I mean, the fighting part is really cool. And, you can't say I've never been in a fight. In karate I sparred a lot and am pretty good...ok ok it's been awhile since I quit karate, like a year or two ago, but that doesn't mean I don't miss it. A part of me kind of wants to get back to it. If anything, I just needed a break since I had been doing it for 8 years non stop. But at least this time I have a real plan. At first, my plan was to skip college and go to TNA. But then insurance was gonna kick me off if I didn't go to college right away and then TNA started travelling instead of staying in Florida.
Then I started thinking about becoming a teacher of Cultural Anthropology. I mean, I'm really interested in the subject but after awhile it seemed to turn into a hobby instead of something I'm willing to fight for tenure for. I did a little soul searching and found that most of my ideas for a major wouldn't produce a good job as soon as I got out of school. Plus, I'm not good at a lot of things that could produce a job that I will most likely not get fired from after a few years. So nursing seemed like a good idea. I mean, think of it, I'm good with people, I can follow direction, good memory, and I can work night shift...I've always wanted to work night shift (yes vampirism has something to do with that but that's another blog).
But then the idea of wrestling came back to me. It really...I don't know, pulls me towards it. Not because I've been watching it all my life or I'm just seeing the glamour side of it. I'm not saying that reading books about the beginnings of wrestling really give me a feel for the hard work but I can see and understand the hard work it takes if that makes any sense. It's like, I can never truly feel what it's like to fight for a handful of people for barely $200 just to chase a dream. But I can understand how they'll do even that to catch the dream and that's something that I'm willing to do. I'd love to perform for people. Something really draws me to it.
But then something really struck me. What if I wanna get married and have kids. I don't know if it's my depression rearing it's ugly head or if these are really my thoughts but what I figure is maybe I won't get married for awhile. And maybe no kids for awhile either. I mean, if I were to go into wrestling it wouldn't be for long. As soon as my looks take a little nose dive or I reach the age of like 30 or 31 then that's the end of me. But if I have a nursing degree that I know I can use then I won't have to worry because I will have done something I've always wanted and in the end have a back up plan.
But I guess right now I'm still in a 'Me' stage where I wanna be free. Like, I'm dating Justin right now. But I still feel free because we're just dating. But something about marriage to me seems constricting. Yeah yeah yeah I know it looked like I was gonna get married this summer but...yeah a lot of people know how that turned out. When I look back on it I remember being scared about being attached to someone forever (especially him). But I've noticed I get a lot done when I'm on my own...kinda dressed like a tomboy. No! No! This is my blog where I tell people about me and what I'm like. It's true, when I dress like a guy I get a lot done. I mean, when I dress like a girl I'm really self conscious because I'm worried about how it looks and I'm constantly fixing it. Plus, if I wear a really 'nice' outfit I get the looks of 'Hey baby' and maybe even dealing with ghetto guys trying to pick me up. But when I'm in my guy clothes and I need to buy something or I just wanna hang out by myself I feel..better. I guess I'm still in the 'Me' stage.
And, as you can tell, one of my big faults is thinking ahead to far. I'm just worried and irritated. Worried about what the future holds..and irritated about not knowing what the future holds. And, when I bring up all of this a person's usual response is, 'Do what makes you happy.' Now, if I knew what sort of thing would make me happy in the long run do you think I'd be asking you what I should do with my life? I THINK NOT!!!
So, now that you know what's going through my head everytime you ask something like, 'What's your major?' 'Any hobbies?' 'Where do you see yourself in 10 years?' do you have any other questions?
It's not like I'm only in it for the fame and fortune but fighting professionaly really appeals to me and I don't know why. I mean, the fighting part is really cool. And, you can't say I've never been in a fight. In karate I sparred a lot and am pretty good...ok ok it's been awhile since I quit karate, like a year or two ago, but that doesn't mean I don't miss it. A part of me kind of wants to get back to it. If anything, I just needed a break since I had been doing it for 8 years non stop. But at least this time I have a real plan. At first, my plan was to skip college and go to TNA. But then insurance was gonna kick me off if I didn't go to college right away and then TNA started travelling instead of staying in Florida.
Then I started thinking about becoming a teacher of Cultural Anthropology. I mean, I'm really interested in the subject but after awhile it seemed to turn into a hobby instead of something I'm willing to fight for tenure for. I did a little soul searching and found that most of my ideas for a major wouldn't produce a good job as soon as I got out of school. Plus, I'm not good at a lot of things that could produce a job that I will most likely not get fired from after a few years. So nursing seemed like a good idea. I mean, think of it, I'm good with people, I can follow direction, good memory, and I can work night shift...I've always wanted to work night shift (yes vampirism has something to do with that but that's another blog).
But then the idea of wrestling came back to me. It really...I don't know, pulls me towards it. Not because I've been watching it all my life or I'm just seeing the glamour side of it. I'm not saying that reading books about the beginnings of wrestling really give me a feel for the hard work but I can see and understand the hard work it takes if that makes any sense. It's like, I can never truly feel what it's like to fight for a handful of people for barely $200 just to chase a dream. But I can understand how they'll do even that to catch the dream and that's something that I'm willing to do. I'd love to perform for people. Something really draws me to it.
But then something really struck me. What if I wanna get married and have kids. I don't know if it's my depression rearing it's ugly head or if these are really my thoughts but what I figure is maybe I won't get married for awhile. And maybe no kids for awhile either. I mean, if I were to go into wrestling it wouldn't be for long. As soon as my looks take a little nose dive or I reach the age of like 30 or 31 then that's the end of me. But if I have a nursing degree that I know I can use then I won't have to worry because I will have done something I've always wanted and in the end have a back up plan.
But I guess right now I'm still in a 'Me' stage where I wanna be free. Like, I'm dating Justin right now. But I still feel free because we're just dating. But something about marriage to me seems constricting. Yeah yeah yeah I know it looked like I was gonna get married this summer but...yeah a lot of people know how that turned out. When I look back on it I remember being scared about being attached to someone forever (especially him). But I've noticed I get a lot done when I'm on my own...kinda dressed like a tomboy. No! No! This is my blog where I tell people about me and what I'm like. It's true, when I dress like a guy I get a lot done. I mean, when I dress like a girl I'm really self conscious because I'm worried about how it looks and I'm constantly fixing it. Plus, if I wear a really 'nice' outfit I get the looks of 'Hey baby' and maybe even dealing with ghetto guys trying to pick me up. But when I'm in my guy clothes and I need to buy something or I just wanna hang out by myself I feel..better. I guess I'm still in the 'Me' stage.
And, as you can tell, one of my big faults is thinking ahead to far. I'm just worried and irritated. Worried about what the future holds..and irritated about not knowing what the future holds. And, when I bring up all of this a person's usual response is, 'Do what makes you happy.' Now, if I knew what sort of thing would make me happy in the long run do you think I'd be asking you what I should do with my life? I THINK NOT!!!
So, now that you know what's going through my head everytime you ask something like, 'What's your major?' 'Any hobbies?' 'Where do you see yourself in 10 years?' do you have any other questions?
5/04/2010
Just Talkin
I'm at home with my parents trying to find a job. This economy freakin sux! I remember when my sisters got jobs just like that. But now, people are hesitant to hire. And they're not doing themselves any favors by requesting experienced people only. I mean, yeah, that helps the people who got fired because of the economy but what about us little whelps who are trying to go out into the world for the first time? Totally not helping at all. Put it this way, I think by the end of this decade there's gonna be a higher precentage of people still living with their parents. Even people who get degrees. Unless it's a job that will never or it's very unlikely for them to not need anymore people then you're screwed. I had to change my major from cultural anthropology to nursing because of that. Sure, people are like, do what makes you happy. And it's true that cultural anthropology would make me happier than nursing but they need to understand we're not at a time where happiness can dictate for you where you wanna go and you'll be happy no matter that troubles you run into...like seemingly perpetual unemployment. Besides, my mom, who is also a nurse, knows a lot of chicks that got a degree for something different after being a nurse because chicks fresh out of nursing school can get hired within months of their graduation. Plus, the hospital my mom works at will hire people as techs as long as they're in nursing school. So I'm gonna go ask them today about working there.
Speaking of people who work, they need to start thinking where they put their tattoos before they go into certain professions. Ok, like, if you're a wrestler there's nothing wrong with getting a tattoo all over your arms, your neck, hell even your face could pass. But if you want to work, say, as a receptionist at a firm, a little cute tattoo of a star or a heart on your wrist isn't going to work! I mean, if it's there you can put on a nice bracelet but what if that one day you forget and there you are surrounded by lawyers, judges, ect with a little tattoo you got to get back at daddy for not letting you drive the car that one night! LOL tell me it's not true! My mom and my sister work in professional areas. And either people get sloppy with trying to hid it or when the head people come by looking at efficiency and stuff like that people scramble and wear things that seem a little off to hide a tattoo. I think my sister said the main problem they're dealing with are the tattoos at the back of the neck. She prolly has chicks wearing a scarf inside, with the air conditioning broke, sitting right in front of the window with the sun shining through sweating up a storm because they were stupid enough to go into a office setting with a tattoo at the back of their necks. I mean, when I get some money I'm gonna get a tattoo of a cool ass dagger on the side of my thigh. And that's fine because I don't wear any skirts that go up that high to a professional place or to a regular place. But the minute I turn 21 and I can go to clubs OF COURSE I'm gonna be wearing short skirts. People need to wear tattoos places that can be covered up if need be until you get a job you want. Like, a guy wants to be a wrestler. That's fine. But he need's to put his tattoos in places no one else can see them until he becomes a wrestler. If he becomes one and knows he's gonna be in that profession for a while he can get tattoos anywhere he chooses.
Another thing my mom sees are the sagging pants. For the last freakin time GUYS WHO LET THEIR PANTS SAG ARE FREAKIN RETARDED!!!! I've asked several different guys if they know where the style comes from. They answer correctly by saying that it comes from inside prison and that if a guy with their pants sagging in prison meant they were ready to do the horizontal mambo gay style (not exactly their words but they said the equivalent). So let me get this straight....they know what it means yet they wear it the style like it's the shits? Really? Really? yeah, way retarded. My school can be pretty ghetto. Guys with their pants almost down to their knees come up to me and ask 'what my name is.' I've gotten so tired of it the last time a guy did that I said to him, "If you can't afford belts then you can't afford me" then walked off. Here's another thing to all the saggers in the building. You're easy pray for cops! I'm not saying all saggers are criminals. But if one is and they try to run, THERE AIN'T GOIN NO WHERE!! Because when you try to run either your pants fall down and you trip or you're busy holding your pants up that you can't fight off a cop that get's close to you and you're tackled! Grrrr how freakin hard is this to comprehend? My mom sees guys who try to sag at work. Like, they have belts and they wear long shirts. They'll try to sag with the long shirts covering up the boxers or cracks you would see. OMGSH totally not worth it.
Anyway, enough that. I've been going down to the Delmar Loop. That place is awesome! The main attraction for me is the drummers. Like, a drumming circle gets together and sometimes people bring their own drums or rattles and they just play and people join either by their own intrusments or they dance. Everytime I go down there I just start dancing. Think of the Utopia philosophers talk about. Where people just get together, have a good time, everyone is equal, and that's what you get when you go down to the drumming circle. That's about the closes to a Utopia I've ever gotten.
So anyway, my classes aren't doing so good so please don't ask. I've been through some stuff (if you're a close friend to me then you know) that has cause so much stress and taken up so much of my time that I couldn't focus on my work. Before, my mentality would be like, "I've failed, I'm horrible, why even try? I'm gonna sit in my room all day and mope." But now my mentality is, "I've failed, I know why, and I'm gonna make sure it never happens again." So I'm gonna get a job, make some money, go back to school for nursing, keep all that drama out of my life because it's not worth letting little momentary dramas mess up your dream. And the people who start drama, kick their butts out of your life cause it's not worth it. Sure, you might lose some good friends. But good friends aren't enough to keep you from doin what you need to be doin.
My first real post *squeal* and this really helps. I mean, some people say that talking about stuff helps them but I feel like writing helps me the most. So, take a look, see what's on my mind, either join and then post comments or post comments on my fb page. Can't wait to hear from you guys. Kthanxbai!!
Speaking of people who work, they need to start thinking where they put their tattoos before they go into certain professions. Ok, like, if you're a wrestler there's nothing wrong with getting a tattoo all over your arms, your neck, hell even your face could pass. But if you want to work, say, as a receptionist at a firm, a little cute tattoo of a star or a heart on your wrist isn't going to work! I mean, if it's there you can put on a nice bracelet but what if that one day you forget and there you are surrounded by lawyers, judges, ect with a little tattoo you got to get back at daddy for not letting you drive the car that one night! LOL tell me it's not true! My mom and my sister work in professional areas. And either people get sloppy with trying to hid it or when the head people come by looking at efficiency and stuff like that people scramble and wear things that seem a little off to hide a tattoo. I think my sister said the main problem they're dealing with are the tattoos at the back of the neck. She prolly has chicks wearing a scarf inside, with the air conditioning broke, sitting right in front of the window with the sun shining through sweating up a storm because they were stupid enough to go into a office setting with a tattoo at the back of their necks. I mean, when I get some money I'm gonna get a tattoo of a cool ass dagger on the side of my thigh. And that's fine because I don't wear any skirts that go up that high to a professional place or to a regular place. But the minute I turn 21 and I can go to clubs OF COURSE I'm gonna be wearing short skirts. People need to wear tattoos places that can be covered up if need be until you get a job you want. Like, a guy wants to be a wrestler. That's fine. But he need's to put his tattoos in places no one else can see them until he becomes a wrestler. If he becomes one and knows he's gonna be in that profession for a while he can get tattoos anywhere he chooses.
Another thing my mom sees are the sagging pants. For the last freakin time GUYS WHO LET THEIR PANTS SAG ARE FREAKIN RETARDED!!!! I've asked several different guys if they know where the style comes from. They answer correctly by saying that it comes from inside prison and that if a guy with their pants sagging in prison meant they were ready to do the horizontal mambo gay style (not exactly their words but they said the equivalent). So let me get this straight....they know what it means yet they wear it the style like it's the shits? Really? Really? yeah, way retarded. My school can be pretty ghetto. Guys with their pants almost down to their knees come up to me and ask 'what my name is.' I've gotten so tired of it the last time a guy did that I said to him, "If you can't afford belts then you can't afford me" then walked off. Here's another thing to all the saggers in the building. You're easy pray for cops! I'm not saying all saggers are criminals. But if one is and they try to run, THERE AIN'T GOIN NO WHERE!! Because when you try to run either your pants fall down and you trip or you're busy holding your pants up that you can't fight off a cop that get's close to you and you're tackled! Grrrr how freakin hard is this to comprehend? My mom sees guys who try to sag at work. Like, they have belts and they wear long shirts. They'll try to sag with the long shirts covering up the boxers or cracks you would see. OMGSH totally not worth it.
Anyway, enough that. I've been going down to the Delmar Loop. That place is awesome! The main attraction for me is the drummers. Like, a drumming circle gets together and sometimes people bring their own drums or rattles and they just play and people join either by their own intrusments or they dance. Everytime I go down there I just start dancing. Think of the Utopia philosophers talk about. Where people just get together, have a good time, everyone is equal, and that's what you get when you go down to the drumming circle. That's about the closes to a Utopia I've ever gotten.
So anyway, my classes aren't doing so good so please don't ask. I've been through some stuff (if you're a close friend to me then you know) that has cause so much stress and taken up so much of my time that I couldn't focus on my work. Before, my mentality would be like, "I've failed, I'm horrible, why even try? I'm gonna sit in my room all day and mope." But now my mentality is, "I've failed, I know why, and I'm gonna make sure it never happens again." So I'm gonna get a job, make some money, go back to school for nursing, keep all that drama out of my life because it's not worth letting little momentary dramas mess up your dream. And the people who start drama, kick their butts out of your life cause it's not worth it. Sure, you might lose some good friends. But good friends aren't enough to keep you from doin what you need to be doin.
My first real post *squeal* and this really helps. I mean, some people say that talking about stuff helps them but I feel like writing helps me the most. So, take a look, see what's on my mind, either join and then post comments or post comments on my fb page. Can't wait to hear from you guys. Kthanxbai!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)